Get all 13 Tracy Grammer releases available on Bandcamp and save 10%.
Includes unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality downloads of I'll Be Here in the Morning (Single), If I Needed You (Single), American Noel (Dave Carter & Tracy Grammer), The Verdant Mile EP, Low Tide, Joy My Love (EP), Little Blue Egg, Book of Sparrows EP, and 5 more.
1. |
hole
04:57
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oh andy i’m afraid i don’t know what i’m made of anymore
can’t make sense of all these shatterlings upon the bedroom floor
there’ll be no sleeping here, just blurs of sorrow through the open door
shoulda warned those boys about me, shoulda warned those boys
i never mean to but somehow i always spill the loving cup
it’s in some passionate exchange, it’s in the way i don’t let up
cannot trust myself in love, seems i always fuck it up
better warn those boys about me, you better warn those boys
’cause i bruise them, every one
there’s a hole in the palm of my love
i cut them; they run
through the hole in the palm of my love
my first love wouldn’t tell me why he changed his mind about our plans
some vicious word i spoke just burned the gold right off the wedding band
kept it to himself and now the ash is flying through my hands
shoulda warned that boy about me
and andy, i’m afraid this story’s gonna play out like the rest
i’ll take this broken bird and hold him to my hopeful, heaving chest
sing the mountain down while god remains oblique and unimpressed
shoulda warned that boy about me
’cause i bruise them, every one
there’s a hole in the palm of my love
i cut them; they run
through the hole in the palm of my love
should they lock me up, oh andy, would you throw away the key
let’s not talk about the girl i was and the wife i’ll never be
let ’em cut the sword from underneath my tongue and set me free
say something good about me, say something good
though i bruised them, every one
there’s a hole in the palm of my love
i cut them; they run
through the hole in the palm of my love
there’s a sword under my tongue
and a hole in the palm of my love
and andy, one more thing, i’m leaving this old violin to you
for all those easy nights and emails and the honest talking-to
for every lie i told i never played a note that wasn’t true
that’s one good thing about me, the one good thing
’cause i bruise them, every one
there’s a hole in the palm of my love
i cut them; they run
through the hole in the palm of my love
there’s a sword under my tongue
and a hole in the palm of my love
can’t save a single one
with a hole in the palm of my love
----
written january 2014 in doylestown PA + shutesbury MA
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2. |
mercy
04:17
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can’t start, too scared
out of time and unprepared
coulda jumped but you didn’t dare
afraid to get it wrong
tongue-tied, tripped again
nobody’s gonna tell you when
or if it’s right, or what you win
or how to sing your song
no
chicken child, all but broke
sway or worry, swallow smoke
swinging from a scarlet oak
it’s ashes out to sea
bad love, hostile lines
something here to redefine
be forgiven for your crimes
now babe, just let it be
yeah
’cause it all unravels
it all falls down down down
and the big black gavel judge is in your head
have mercy mercy mercy
mercy now
bright flash, burning tower
shadows at the witching hour
all your secrets, all that power
and the promises of rain
shot black shooting star
medicine’s in mother’s jar
freedom’s in the buffet car
now get up on that train
’cause it all unravels …
right words fix the chain
hook yourself to this refrain
all in sorrow, all in pain
know that you belong
’cause it all unravels …
-- doylestown, pennsylvania
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3. |
forty-niner
04:47
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everybody’s in their places
with plastic buckets and hopeful faces
padded stools and a couple glasses
one for liquor, one for ashes
it’s nickel slots and blackjack tables
saggy jeans and phony sables
sirens whine as the nickels fall
pull again, bet it all
then –
hit it big, hit it fast
it’s in your blood, the die is cast
drop a dollar, drop a dime
you’re an urban forty-niner
sweet civilian silver miner
and i’m the eye that sees it all
from behind the disco ball
fortune is a fickle mistress
but jesus christ, you can’t complain
hundred dollars in your pocket
“lucky” is your middle name
dealer boys in blue and black
dealer girls with ample racks
aces high and the deck is stacked
see ’em swagger, see ’em laugh
dropping dollars, dropping dimes
no such thing as closing time
double down and live the dream
pretty ladies, jimmy beam
you’re an urban forty-niner
sweet civilian silver miner
and i’m the eye that sees it all
from behind the mirrored wall
laughing fortune, texas tea
leopard spots and turtle treasure
double diamond, fire and sea
cleopatra, life of leisure
golden mountain, bigfoot bonus
here today and now they own us
lucky fortune, sun and moon
where there’s gold, mr. woo
descant:
laughing, crying,
’cause you work so hard
didn’t they tell you there’s
no such thing
as easy money
baby’s picture in your locket
jesus christ on a chain
seven dollars in your pocket
dealer boys with empty hands
cocktail girls and wedding bands
aces high but the chips are flat
break a sweat, watch your back
dropping dollars, bumming dimes
no such thing as quitting time
double down and make a fist
lady luck, near miss
you’re an urban forty-niner
sweet civilian silver miner
and i’m the eye that sees it all
yeah, mine’s the eye that sees it all
from behind the waterfall
-- blue lake casino, blue lake, california
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4. |
the mark
04:29
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abel lives off the fat of the land
me, i got an old man’s back and a young man’s plan
ain’t gonna plow nor reap nor pray
god always liked him better anyway
you shoulda seen my brother abel
boots on the floor, hands on the table
chapter and verse of the filial fable –
i am cain
tell me who wouldn’t rather tend than plow
hell, i don’t believe in it anyhow
no justice and no world to come
heaven’s right here and me, i’m gonna get me some
i shot him through his pretty boy eye
i knew that’d make his mama cry
i ate shepherd’s pie as i watched him die
i am cain, i am cain, i am cain
i’m headed out for the land of nod
where they got themselves a different god
’cause that mean-ass god i don’t believe in
marked my head as i was leavin’
am i my brother’s keeper
i’m hell’s spy, i’m the devil’s sleeper
the seed got sown, i’m just the reaper
i am cain, i am cain, i am cain
i am cain, i am cain, i am cain
--
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5. |
daffodil days
03:55
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a festival tent, a wintertime trip
that library tour, his trembling lip
when he fell for me
two years to the day, our daffodil hour
two hearts finally home, true love finally ours
he will marry me
we planned on living light and traveling far
currency of laughter, a couple old guitars
a stormy first year, the whippingest gale
rough waters ahead, red flag for a sail
we’re in trouble here
ours daffodil stems all bent and torn thin
their sad yellow mouths cried the bleak giving-in
surrendering
we did not have a language for our pain
i flooded him with pleas and sighs, he didn’t say a thing
i waited for words, i watched him for signs
but there’s nobody here and the garden’s gone dry
those shoes in the hall, my towel on the rack
and that frame on the nail – i take it all back
’cause no one can survive on nothing-there
i came here for the long haul and it don’t seem fair
what to do but pack up and move on
in search of other gardens
singing other songs
last box in the truck, my cat in her crate
so long to this love and my daffodil days
bye-bye
-- doylestown, pennsylvania
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6. |
were you ever here
03:26
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come
tell me something you want
tell me something you feel
i thought that was part of the deal
love
is a sea full of stars in the morning
it’s the sweetness inside of the storming
but you have let go of my hand
we are always home
even standing near
but i miss you, dear
there’s a closing door
and a fence of fear
and i can’t get clear:
were you ever here?
i, well –
i feel like i’m starving for sunshine
and the meters are threatening a flat line
that wasn’t part of the plan
love
is the rain coming down in your blue eye
it’s the backroads we promised to live by
long before you let go of my hand
we are always here
but you’re never home
and i feel alone
such an awful ache
when you disappear
and we’re both right here
now the question mark
is my souvenir
of these three long years –
were you ever here?
-- holden beach, north carolina
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7. |
good life
05:32
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twenty years old, just a fitful young man
with a fire in my eye, liked a drink in my hand
kissed a pretty young girl, got a gold wedding band
and a baby on the way that we didn't quite plan and oh –
headed out west and i ran a little hot
and the drink in my hand, well, it didn’t cool me off
it was right about the time my kid was sixteen
i was scaring everybody, i got so bitter and mean and oh –
but i used to dream of a little rowin’ boat
it’d be me and the dog and we’d fish and we’d float
and we’d live in one-level ranch
with toads ’round the pond and doves in the branches
and oh, what a good life
sick of my scheming and costly mistakes
i was losing my business, i was burning up the brakes
i got sober as a mountain and my river turned cool
i’d make it up to you, mama, but you’re leavin’ this fool, and oh –
’cause i used to dream we’d be gettin’ up at dawn
we’d have chickens in the pen and some goats on the lawn
and big trees and worms in the pail
my heart on my sleeve, yeah, my love wouldn’t fail
in my good life, in my good life
well, i’m sixty-five now and they tell me i’m sick
this pain in my belly, it is the reckoning stick, so i
call up my daughter and we cry ourselves clear
it’s forgiveness and grace and i wish you were here, y’know –
last time we talked i was coming undone
’bout a sweet summer peach that tastes just like the sun
with the juice from that fruit dripping all down my face
there is only this moment, only this place:
and the dream of a little rowin’ boat
it’d be me and the dog and we'd fish and we’d float
and we’d live in one-level ranch
with toads ’round the pond and doves in the branches
and oh, yeah, what a good life
what a good life
what a good life
let it all go now and wipe it all clean
ain’t no time for regret in the great in-between
it was a hell of a ride and i wish i had known
you can worry, you can wander, but we’re all just goin’ home
i’ve had a good life
i’ve had a good life
i’ve had a good life
-- doylestown, pennsylvania
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8. |
the verdant mile
04:22
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i didn’t want to burn like this, so close to the bone
no muscle left to carry it, this black bag of stones
the august heat, the autumn rain, and winter’s face of blue
these seasons keep their spinning up but there’s no sign of you
there is no sign
richard says the whippoorwill taught him how to go
i tell him death is just a dream, but what do i know?
it’s everything and nothing when the spirit cracks the sky
but flowers fold and go to seed and no one questions why
and so i walk this verdant mile of memory with you
the gentle arms of eden and the mountain get me through
i miss you like i love the sound of those blackbirds in the trees
i sit alone and wish that maybe one of you would come visit me
but no matter how much seed i hang or what prayer i call out
i cannot bring that bird in from the field or make an angel come around
and so i walk ...
-- portland oregon / missoula montana
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9. |
cloudbusting
04:06
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i still dream of orgonon
i wake up crying
you’re making rain
and you’re just in reach
when you and sleep escape me
you’re like my yo-yo
that glowed in the dark
what made it special
made it dangerous
so i bury it
and forget
but every time it rains
you’re here in my head
like the sun coming out
ooh, i just know that something good is gonna happen
i don’t know when
but just saying it could even make it happen
on top of the world, looking over the edge
you could see them coming
you looked too small in their big, black car
to be a threat to the men in power
i hid my yo-yo
in the garden
but i can’t hide you
from the government
oh god, daddy –
i won’t forget
’cause every time it rains
you’re here in my head
like the sun coming out
ooh, i just know that something good is gonna happen
i don’t know when
but just saying it could even make it happen
we’re cloudbusting
we’re cloudbusting
the sun’s coming out
the sun’s coming out
your son’s coming out
ooh, i just know that something good is coming
the sun’s coming out …
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10. |
free
05:19
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once upon a heartbreak, i was hot and sore
punching at the darkness in my private war
i could not find the light i was so desperate for
or any open door
i wore my tattered shoes out on the grieving road
fell into the arms of folks i didn’t know
finally got so weary of this heavy load
i learned to let it go
i’m free
all the worry, all the running away is done
and blessed
to be standing where i am
with my feet upon the sand
welcome, sweet contentment
peace has found me
whatever comes will be okay
you know it will
back then, i was running with a bitter crowd
wrapped these songs around me like some widow’s shroud
the poetry i wrote then was as mad and loud
as any thundercloud
now i’m standing where the river rushes to the sea
full moon rising high above the redwood trees
and every trial and trouble, every tragedy
is just a memory
i’m free
all the worry, all the running away is done
and blessed
oh, to be standing where i am in the beauty of this land
welcome, sweet contentment
peace has found me
whatever comes will be okay
you know it will
i’ve seen floods and i’ve seen fires
suffered losses, thieves, and liars
hear them howling in the wind
for every storm that comes around
and every love that let me down
a flower blooms in the shallow ground
hoping to be found
now i’m standing where the river rushes to the sea
full moon rising high above the redwood trees
and every trial and trouble, every tragedy
is just a memory
i’m free
all the worry, all the running away is done
and blessed
oh to be standing where i am with a flower in my hand
welcome, sweet contentment
peace has found me
whatever comes will be okay
whatever comes, it’s gonna be okay
whatever comes will be okay
you know it will
-- little river, california
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Tracy Grammer Greenfield, Massachusetts
Writer. Actor. Storyteller. Singer. Multi-instrumentalist. Former head cheerleader, now a fearless navigator of the
heart.
“One of the finest pure musicians anywhere in folkdom.” - Boston Globe
“A brilliant artist.” - Joan Baez
“Her gifts as a musician are like that of a painter who is a master of chiaroscuro, offering light and shadow at every turn.“ - Mary Chapin Carpenter
... more
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